Cameron Simcik
Cameron Simcik is a graduate of Bucknell University. She has written for Her Campus and is currently the Philadelphia Travel City Editor for The Daily Meal and a contributing writer for TheFW and GuySpeed.
We’re self-proclaimed Halloween geeks. But honestly, how can you not be? There are so many ways to celebrate the holiday that by the time October 31st rolls around, our entire lives are defined by creepy stuff and ridiculous garb. Our pets aren’t big fans of the festive takeover, but that’s never stopped us from dressing them up as a turkey dog!
There are two things we know for sure about puppies: they’re unpredictably hilarious and sometimes have adorably strange antics. Remember our favorite dogs going to town on peanut butter? That’s the kind of silly stuff we love.
Well canine fans of all ages, we’ve discovered dogs have yet another highly underrated quirk, and it comes in the form of shoes.
As much as we love babies, there are times when they can be pure sources of terror. Unbearably adorable, charming, way-too-cute-to-get-mad at sources of terror, but terror-inducing nonetheless. In all honestly, we’re a little jealous these miniature munchkins can get away with virtually anything. If we stuck jelly beans up our nose or took it upon ourselves to redecorate the kitchen walls with Crayola, we’d be deemed citizens of Crazy Town, population: One.
As true gentleman, there are a few things we’ll never do. These include turning down an opportunity to receive a yoga boner and picking a fight with a grandma. Chivalry is dead these days, so it’s our duty to bring that crap back. While feasting our eyes upon yoga butt will never go out of style, Granny’s the one switching things up recently; Khandace Cossit has got some major beef, and she’s looking for a fight.
Honestly, how scary can a 56-year-old from Sandston, Virginia be? Answer: very.
Just like our fellow testosterone-sweating, meat-loving friend Ron Swanson, we’re big fans of bacon. To put our love for the greasy snack into perspective, learning about the horrific pending bacon shortage sent us into a minor panic attack, but it’s difficult to fully encompass our feelings for the meat strips. Luckily, a bacon-loving middle-schooler has done that for us.
Discovering a Pikachu pug or a Rabbi cat will never, ever get old. We have absolutely no explanation regarding this adorably aww-worthy obsession, but we’re pretty sure most of you will agree with us. But why does it seem like we limit our dressing-up-pets possibilities to dogs, cats and the occasional baby pig? It’s about time sheep took a whack at this whole costume funny business, and we couldn’t have hoped for a better debut.
Don’t quote us, but we’re fairly certain a zombie apocalypse is pending. Why? The fact that ‘Here Comes Honey Boo Boo’ was renewed for a second season is reason enough to believe it. But even the military is prepping for a zombie takeover, and in all honestly, we’re totally on board! There’s a large possibility that’s due to our obsession with ‘The Walking Dead,' where all our spooked-out dreams are played out.
Halloween is the best holiday around, hands down. Why? We get boatloads of candy for free, we can dress up as Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson and no one will bat an eyelash. Is there anything more magical than parading around in ridiculous garb and entering sugar coma after sugar coma? No way!
Politics are confusing. One day Obama and Romney join forces for a rendition of 'Hot and Cold' and the next thing we know, Big Bird is thrown into the debate debacle. Seriously, presidential candidates? How can you expect to be taken seriously among these ridiculous shenanigans? We think it’s about time you take some tips from a truly determined politician-- one who puts the people first and knows our country like the back of his...paw.
When it comes to putting things in our mouth, we don't get grossed out by a lot of stuff. Unless our ladies are a little funky downtown, then that's straight up gross. But other than that, we'll kick back with an ice cold bull testicle beer or down a cup of cat poop coffee with no problem.