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Time for New Jeans…Jon Rips Out His Crotch Tying His Shoe!

crotch rip

I came in this morning as I often come into the station, with both sneakers untied. I’m always in a hurry and just slide them on and go. Today, that plan backfired on me…

As I got down on my right knee to tie my left sneaker, I heard a loud tearing sound. I simultaneously felt less pressure “down there,” and sensed a cool breeze where there ought not be cool breezes. Yep, my whole crotch….shredded like those little frosted wheat squares I love so much. But I digress.

I’m not one for clothes shopping but I guess I’ll have to do something about this. I just need a pair of ten dollar generic K-Mart jeans. Do they even make them anymore? I don’t need designer. Calvin Klein? Just give me Wranglers or whatever doesn’t cost me more than what I’ve got in my drink holder and I’m happy.

Brrrrr….gotta go shopping…just had another cool breeze hit me.

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