‘Nervous’ Woman on Edge After Older Male Neighbor Constantly Tries to Talk to Her
A woman is feeling uneasy around her own house due to her neighbor's constant presence.
On Mumsnet, the "nervous" woman explained how her male neighbor materializes every time she's in her yard, as well as finds a reason to talk to her. Now, she feels uncomfortable in her own space.
"I'm 30. l live alone in a small terraced house. I've been living here for one year. Next door to me lives a man in his late 50s. We have nothing in common. We would say hello the odd times but that's it. The houses don't open right onto the street. We have a very small front garden, walls and gate each. My front garden is very small, it's not something you would sit in. So I am only ever in it to mow my small lawn, paint the small walls, etc.," she wrote via Mumsnet.
"Any time that I am EVER in my front garden, my male neighbor will come over right to my walk, to talk to me," she continued.
The woman detailed that last time she was mowing her lawn, the man came out of his house and started chatting with her.
But things reached a tipping point for the woman after the neighbor asked her for a favor.
"Today, I was painting my small wall in my front garden. He came over right to my walk and said 'Hey! I'm expecting a package. Will you take it in? They said they'd leave it with a neighbor.' I didn't want to but I said yes even though I didn't want to, as I was nervous and trying to get him to go away. He will probably be over to me later looking for it, which causes more stress for me," she shared.
Now, the woman feels anxious every time she goes to spend time in her garden, causing her to "dash in and out" as she knows the man will come out and approach her if he sees her.
"He is creeping me out. I literally cannot go in my garden and do one simple thing without him coming straight over. It's giving me anxiety. If I saw my female neighbor across the road doing gardening, I wouldn't go straight over, lean over her wall and start talking to her. I know I would be intruding on her privacy. He does it every single time. It's really giving me anxiety. I don't know what to do," the woman concluded.
Users supported the woman in the comments, suggesting she should try to be more direct with the man.
"Just tell him it's very intrusive of him stepping over the wall every time you are out in the garden, there's no need for it. Be direct," one person wrote.
"You don't owe him eye contact, you aren't obliged to pause when he speaks or give him any attention at all. Just carry on with what you are doing. I know it feels rude. But it's OK," someone else commented.
Another person tried to offer up a reasonable explanation for the man's actions.
"He's probably bored and lonely. But you don't owe him company. Be polite but brisk. Don't get into a conversation and if he asks about deliveries, etc., again just say you're not reliably in, so it might be better if he asks someone else. Headphones or sunglasses are also good ways to help you keep your boundaries a little bit more comfortable. Just carry on with your job. If he persists, then say you really haven't got time to chat and have jobs you want to get on with," they recommended.