Ways to Not Be a Garbage Human: Grocery Store Edition
We encounter garbage humans every day. These are people that appear to do ridiculous things for no apparent reason. Maybe they're not paying attention. Maybe they lack common sense. Maybe they just don't care.
Here are 5 tips to make sure you're not one of these people, at least while getting your weekly groceries:
5. Slow down in the parking lot-Seriously, who are you trying to impress? The mom trying to load her two toddlers and 12 bags of groceries out of the car-themed cart and into the minivan? Bro, I can assure you, she'd much rather have you not drive like a bat out of hell with her kids around. Where are you trying to go so fast?
4. Stop taking up the whole aisle-Nothing drives me nuts quite like Suzie trying to decide which frozen fish sticks on one side of the aisle to get while her cart hangs out on the other side. Commit to one side, Suzie! Oh and this also goes for when you run into Charlie from that cycling class you took for a month. Don't take up the whole space to catch up.
3. Put your unwanted items away-Look I get it. You grabbed a bag of almonds because you wanted a salty snack that wasn't completely terrible for you, but they're like $14 and that bag of Fritos is like $3. It's ok to take the Fritos, just put the almonds back.
2. Don't hog the self-checkout-Nine times out of ten you'll find me here but using the self-checkout requires a level of awareness. I think they should be viewed similar to express lanes. In and out. I don't know how many times I've popped into a store to grab a salad for lunch and have had to wait 20 minutes for someone to ring up groceries for their family of 4, apply coupons, buy items that need employee approval, etc. The checkout people are not scary. I promise. Plus they tag team with a bagger meaning less work for you!
1. PUT YOUR DANG CART AWAY-This one drives me absolutely mad. I'm petty enough about this that I have literally seen someone leave a cart in the parking lot and I'll go out of my way to grab it and give the individual the stink eye the entire time I'm retrieving it. Not only is this pure laziness but it also takes up precious parking space and makes the store employee's job unnecessarily more difficult and dangerous.
That's about it from this peanut gallery. Do you have any other grocery store pet peeves?