Okay ladies, ovary up.

If you are a woman between the ages of 20-60, I need your attention. Something is going to happen to your ovaries and it all sounds like a horror story written by Rob Zombie.

I am not a professional Gyno or librarian so don't take my word for this but listen to my words because hearsay can also be very important.

I heard a word yesterday that perked up my ears and shook my hoop earrings.

Perimenopause. Ew.

This means, Menopause and Period had a baby and they named it, Peri Menopause.

A few key words for you.. Hot flashes before the hot flashes, sweats before the sweats, hormonal imbalance before the... well, you get it.

According to Mayo Clinic, 

"Perimenopause means "around menopause" and refers to the time during which your body makes the natural transition to menopause, marking the end of the reproductive years. Perimenopause is also called the menopausal transition. Women start perimenopause at different ages."

So there is a pause before the BIG pause. Before you say goodbye to your reproductivity and cry, a lot.

This is like menopause on menopause on menopause and I am not agreeing with any of it. This can start as early as your mid-thirties and I am over that. Times up? NO! I am taking a stand in my own power.

Dear all of the PAUSES,

First things first, I don't like your name because "men" do not get to be included in a title that literally means our reproductive organs are coming to a halt. They are already in charge of enough.

I am here to say, I am taking a seat from you. I am cancelling you. My body, my choice and I choose to skip Perimenopause, Menopause, and whatever other torture you're going to put my body through.

I already consider myself as a savage female and this female body has already been put through traumatic changes including but no limited to stretch marks, long periods, cramps, baby having, baby milking and so on.

I am choosing to NOT participate in menopause.

Here's the thing, I haven't even lived yet. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up and that doesn't include traveling through watching my ovaries go through a slow death.

Additionally, I don't want a beard.

With that said, I thank you for listening to my rant and encourage you, if you are a savage boss lady like me, to choose to ignore the PAUSES.


Lizzy Snyder

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