Cooper’s Daughter Asks Her Elf On The Shelf Strange Questions

If you are a parent, there's a good chance your family has had an Elf on The Shelf.

In case you are not...  According to Wikipedia, Santa employs "scout elves" that hang out at homes that have children.  Every night, they fly back to the North Pole to report how the children are behaving to Santa.  In the morning, the elves return to the home and "hide" in a new spot.  Basically, throughout the month of December, they play a game of hide and seek with children all while spying on them.

Our elf is named Sparkles and, for the last few years, Denise (with some help from younger sister, Annie) has communicated with Sparkles through notes,  Last year, it was in the form of a notebook.  This year, she writes a nightly letter to our elf.  In the morning, assuming her and her sister have not been awful, there is a response.

Each year, the letters start with greetings and a few Christmas gift requests.  Then, they move on to more specific questions.  The last couple weeks, though, it almost seems like Denise is running out of questions to ask Sparkles.  They've gotten kind of strange...  Actually, no, they've gotten REALLY strange.

Some of the more interesting ones...

Is Santa your dad?

Does Santa wear a green hat in the summertime?

What happens to elves that are bad and ignore warnings from Santa?

Do you like red and green unicorns?

Can you send me a picture of you as a baby?  One of your whole body?

Can you tell me how to become an Elf on The Shelf?

Sometimes she makes requests about where Sparkles will be hanging out the next morning.

Can you go to the dollhouse and sit in the Baby Jesus scene (the Nativity)

Can you sit on the toilet next?

Do your kids write to their elf?  What's the strangest thing they've asked?