Creepy DMs: Jacob Wants to Be Brittany’s Sugar Daddy

Probably 1-2 times a month or so I get weird DM's. Some I couldn't possibly share due to their explicit or offensive content. Sometimes I get messages from folks who may be well intended but are seriously lacking in social skills resulting in some very uncomfortable messages.

Mostly what I get are messages of extreme adoration. I don't mind having fans or internet friends. I've cultivated some friendships that are quite wonderful, but I have paragraphs, PARAGRAPHS, from folks writing about how they love me or could love me if given the chance. Those weird me out more than anything. Again, I think most of them are harmless, just lacking in social skills. A lot of messages offer a financial incentive.

"How much for foot photos?"

"What could I give you for some private shots? ;)"

Sigh.

Once in a while, I get these offers to be a sugar baby. Don't know what that is?

According to Urban Dictionary, because of course, that's where we go for these sorts of things, a sugar baby is "A young female or male who is financially pampered/cared for by a sugar daddy or sugar mama in exchange for companionship."

Lovely.

And this is no offense to those in a consensual sugary type relationship. It's just not my thing.

Mister Jacob popped into my Insta DM's this morning with an offer I could absolutely refuse.

So either this guy wants me to send him iTunes gift cards in exchange for cash, or he really, and I mean REALLY, needs to learn how to approach women. Especially with such a forward offer to a complete stranger.