I know that what you're probably thinking is that I'm the world's worst dad. I mean, how do you let your infant eat pieces of your Christmas tree? Well, truth be told, I didn't actually let him, he's just a honey badger baby and does whatever he wants.

You see, every five weeks my wife has to go in and work from the office as opposed to her typical remote-work schedule. This means that I have to rush home after the Moose Morning Show so she can leave for work and I can spend the day (solo) with the kids. I have never, and will never, complain about getting all this extra one on one time with my littles, but sometimes it can get a little (a lot) stressful.

This all took place yesterday at about lunch time. I distinctly remember the time because the Price is Right was just wrapping up on TV.  That is the signal that it is time to make Gavin his lunch. I put Dawson in his little activity saucer, which has no wheels and is stationary, in the living room and went to the kitchen to make Gavin's lunch. Mind you, I can see the living room clear as day from where I am, so how I missed this is beyond me.

As I'm preparing a world-class peanut butter & jelly sandwich for the toddler, I hear the familiar sound of Dawson gagging. As I looked up to see what was going on I quickly realized he had somehow shimmied his STATIONARY activity saucer all the way over to the Christmas tree and had shoved a branch in his mouth. By the time I got over to the tree he was just chomping away like nobody's business. I slid him back and yanked the branch from his grasp. Of course I then had to run my finger through his mouth to retrieve all the rogue pine needles that were in there.

For the record, the baby was completely fine and no harm was done to him or the tree. However, even as a parent of three, this is a good reminder that things can happen and they can happen very quickly. Even when you think your infant is in a stationary toy, they are ridiculous little humans and they will still do exactly what they want- even if it means they want to eat a tree.

James Christmas Tree 2020

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