I’m not sure which is more ridiculous, snorting cocaine or calling 911 because your wife stole yours, but this is a real story.

According to the Smoking Gun website, Robert Collins, 39, of Ohio, dialed the emergency number to report a theft, theft of drugs, yes; he dialed 911 to say that his wife stole his cocaine.

The police showed up at Collins' residence, but instead of helping Collins, they arrested him and charged him with misusing 911 and possession of drug paraphernalia. As of yet there is no word on the whereabouts of Collins' wife, the alleged cocaine thief.

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